PSB – My thoughts exactly!

Kate–

That was totally my point!

If she said that a relationship is sacred with or without a marriage license and that she doesn’t believe in marriage because the paper doesn’t validate her commitment, then I can understand it.

But–

Her comments seem to indicate that she feels that having a child with somebody is less of a sacred commitment than marriage. This is why it doesn’t make sense. I’m not judging her at all, in regards to not wanting to legally get married – I just don’t understand the rationale that you can have a kid with any boyfriend, but you should only get married if you truly mean it.

This is why I think this is out of context. She must have explained her views more thoroughly earlier/later in the interview. I just don’t think it’s a logical statement.

What on earth is she saying???? Her statement makes absolutely no sense.

Renee – good point. I just have to be amused at all those who are confused about her comments on marriage considering she is so “smart.” Guess what – I am smart too – and very well educated – and I agree with her. Funny – yet odd – argument.

Sarah – You make it sound like there is something wrong w/ quitting your job to be a mother. Personally I’m surprised more celebrities don’t take off at least some time to be w/ their kids. They don’t need the money so why not spend some time staying home w/ their kids when they are young.

*Sign*…we are just going to have the same debate over and over again aren’t we. I guess I’m defending Natalie cause I feel the same way.Also, when people judge people who are not married but still have kids, they are ignoring gay parents who cannot legally marry in the U.S.

i think i get what everyone is saying here.

Some argue that ‘what’s the point of marriage if divorce rates are high? I might as well just stay with my partner and doing that, I can still be committed to him.’ But that’s where the flaw of the statement comes in.

BUT if you and your partner are totally committed, what’s stopping you from getting married? If it’s because of the high divorce rates, then what’s there to fear if you say you are totally committed to each other and won’t end up just another divorce statistic?

If it’s because it’s ‘just a piece of paper’, then by making that statement you’re watering down the idea of marriage and making it seem it’s fine for people to just divorce their spouses when the going gets tough cos’ after all, the marriage is ‘just a piece of paper’…it can be thrown away easily.

But in truth, marriage IS commitment because the idea of marriage is ABOUT commitment. Sure, you can be committed without getting married but why marriage came about is to celebrate your commitment with people around you. What’s wrong with that? In this case, marriage is NOT a piece of paper at all, the certificate is simply a legal document for administration purposes. Marriage is a celebration of love and commitment.

I think in the past many people view it that way…just that due to alot of cultural factors and perhaps folly and sin of humankind, people just stopped believing in the true meaning behind marriage.

I think the different viewpoints in this discussion simply stems from differing opinions of what ‘marriage’ means.

If Natalie thinks marriage is just a piece of paper, then yeah she should just not get married and go ahead with living with a committed partner and have kids together. But because she added in the part about divorce rates being high…then it doesnt make sense anymore and contradicts the rest of her statement…which explains why some commentors here think the statement doesn’t reflect her usual smart self.

Ok, so I get that divorce has become so common that it’s less desirable to get married if you aren’t into the whole “commitment on a piece of paper thing,” but I don’t think whether or not it’s easy to get a divorce is a valid reason to decide against marriage….what does it matter if your personal commitment to each other is strong? Whatever, I really like Natalie Portman and think she’s a very well educated, very smart woman so I have a hard time criticizing her, especially considering she lives in a very commitment-phobe world.

That all being said, I commend her for the decision to take a break from acting to raise her kids. Acting isn’t like a regular “9-5″ job where you can still work and see your children- acting often requires parents to be away from their children for months at a time or to relocate their families if they want to be together. Natalie should be given praise for her ability to put her kids first and offer them a stable childhood. There are a number of celebs out there that insist on dragging their kids along to suit their own agendas, seemingly without regard for their children’s sense of stability.

Lauren, you’re missing my point.Marriage is a piece of paper. You can be just as committed to someone without ever being married. I’m saying, we shouldn’t judge some one just because they don’t want to get married. Really..it’s not the end of the world.I guess I feel like every time people complain about it, it’s like they are judging every unwed mother out there or those who choose to have a baby on their own or even those who are single with no kids and never want to be married. It’s a lifestyle choice and I think we should respect that as mature adults.

“Some people believe in marriage, some don’t, can we just leave it at that and be happy.”

You obviously can’t or you wouldn’t have taken PSB’s, Megan’s, and Sarah’s comments so personally and practically scolded them for sharing their opinions.

Personally, I agree with all three, especially Megan. If marriage really is nothing more than a piece of paper as so many claim, why not just get it and all the benefits that come with it? What skin is it off your back, really, to go to town hall with your partner for 20 minutes and commit to him or her in every way possible? I think it’s because whether people want to admit it or not, there *is* so much more to marriage than a simple piece of paper, and the notion of what exactly it will bring scares people.

And I agree with PSB that these quotes sound quite out of context for Natalie. She is clearly an intelligent woman, and she has to know that divorce is far from easy. As Sarah said, It’s a heck of a lot harder for a husband to divorce his family than for a partner to pack his bags and walk out the door.