Missy Elliott Says She’ll Likely Adopt
Missy Elliott says she’d "definitely" like to be a mom someday, though it probably won’t be biologically. The 37-year-old Grammy Award-winning rapper admits that she’s intimidated by the thought of labor and delivery, telling People "I don’t know if I can take that kind of pain." She adds,
Maybe in the year 2020 you could just pop a baby out and it’d be fine. But right now I’d rather just adopt.
Missy’s seventh album, Block Party, is scheduled for release on Sept. 9.
Source: People; Photo by Dave Allocca/StarTraks.
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August 5th, 2008 at 5:38 am
Not wanting to go through labor and delivery is not reason enough to adopt!
August 5th, 2008 at 7:22 am
I hate that people are so JUDGEMENTAL! She wants to be a mother, but doesn’t want to go through the physical business. Fine with me! I totally understand! If someone can adopt a child and show it love and give it a good life, it’s never a bad idea!!!
August 5th, 2008 at 7:53 am
Princesa — I do agree.
While it is fantastic for somebody to choose to adopt for the right reasons — it is ridiculous that her reason is that she just can’t be bothered to go through child birth.
August 5th, 2008 at 7:57 am
Erin…Agreed 100%. Kids are not for everyone. I have a few friends who love kids and are actually great with kids but they dont want any for themselves. No problem! I think we have enough unwanted kids in this world!!!
August 5th, 2008 at 8:27 am
I cannot believe that someone actually said they don’t think her reasoning was “good enough.” Ask the children sitting in foster homes if it’s a “good enough” reason for them? I thought the whole purpose of adoption was to share your love? Maybe the REAL reason she’s adopting has nothing to do with the labor. Maybe she can’t get pregnant and doesn’t want to share it? You never know. Some people are so critical.
August 5th, 2008 at 8:36 am
Have we really reached a stage where we will criticize someone’s REASONS for doing a good thing?
Wow. It’s amazing what people will have a problem with.
It’s a fact that there ARE women out there who are TERRIFIED at the thought of the excruciating pain of labor even though they love children. I don’t think Missy should have to pretend otherwise.
She’s just being human and expressing a fear, yet still some people want to jump down her throat for daring to express an opinion that doesn’t meet with their high and mighty standards.
Adoption is great but her ‘reasons’ are ‘wrong’?
I commend her for wanting to adopt, because I’m sure the motherless child she takes in won’t care what her reasons are…he or she will just be happy to have a home.
And I commend her for expressing a genuine fear that some women have, and pity the women out there that do express themselves and are bashed by the people around them who think they don’t have the right to feel what they feel, that being afraid of labor pain means they’re ’selfish’ and must IMMEDIATELY get pregnant and ‘get over it’.
I keep saying not all women are meant to give birth or become mothers, and I think by now, in 2008, we should have come out of that archaic way of thinking.
August 5th, 2008 at 8:37 am
Good for Missy. Missy have your kids however you like.
There are lots of kids out there who need a loving home.
August 5th, 2008 at 8:48 am
to princesa and n.s. HOW DARE YOU… how dare you… u know what, if i write the other things i wanna write, they’re not going to post it…
WOW… the GALL of some ppl…
August 5th, 2008 at 8:49 am
I believe her main reason for adopting is wanting to be a mother and that is a perfect reason to adopt.
August 5th, 2008 at 9:12 am
Why can she choose to adopt because of her own personal reasons?? Stop being so judgmental. It’s not an attractive quality.
August 5th, 2008 at 9:56 am
Interesting. I happen to be one of those “selfish” people who is also petrified of the labor and birth process. Suffering from years of debilitating womanly problems can do that to a person. Having others boldy professing that what you are enduring is “NOTHING compared to giving birth” only works to reinforce that fear.
Healthy, selfish or silly attitude aside, it is what it is and just goes to show how all of us are uniquely wired or pre-conditioned to feel the way we do. It doesn’t make someone wrong or right- but for crying out loud, to judge someone for being fearful of the act of birth seems pretty ridiculous.
Live and let live. Sheesh.
August 5th, 2008 at 10:06 am
good for her!
there are TONS of babies out there who need loving homes!
August 5th, 2008 at 10:20 am
Shidney, stay strong. I hope you have supportive people surrounding you to negate the foolishness of the others that say these insensitive and stupid things to you.
It’s like people will pick at anything just to be able to feel superior to someone else. A lot of women put others down when is comes to the issues of pregnancy, childbirth, epidurals and so much more.
The nerve…the GALL of some people.
August 5th, 2008 at 10:37 am
Foster kids have nothing to do with this. Like other Hollywood stars (Cruise, Crow, and others) she will most likely adopt a newborn. Healthy newborns do not languish in foster care.
And there are not “tons” of babies waiting for homes. That’s why most prospective adoptive parents wait years.
How she chooses to become a mother and why, is her business. There is nothing wrong with adoption.
August 5th, 2008 at 11:30 am
to nosoupforyou, i may be misunderstanding you… and i am fully aware of that… but i’d like to point out that
adoptive parents who have a laundry list of “what” they want, wait years… ppl who just want a CHILD and don’t mind going through the foster care system or the government don’t wait 45 min before the social worker is calling them to come and get a child… but yeah, if they’re trying to do private adoption OR get a designer baby, yes, they will languish in the system for some time…
August 5th, 2008 at 11:48 am
*Sigh*
Fay, do some research before commenting, please.
I have very dear friends who have been on a waiting list for two years now, and all they want is a baby, any baby who they can hold and love, they do not have a “list” of things, they would even take in and love a disabled child, a mentally ill child, or an older child, they are loving honest people, and yet they are still waiting.
So don’t say “they won’t wait 45 minutes”.
That is incredibly wrong.
N.S, I also agree.
With people who are desperately wanting children, and they cannot conceive naturally it is a insult to them that somebody like Missy Elliot would say she wasn’t interested in having a child only because of the pain.
August 5th, 2008 at 1:33 pm
What she meant is that she wants to have a baby, but doens’t want the pain of labour, and that’s fine. In that case, she can definitely adopt. I dont’ think she meant that she wants a baby just so she doesnt want to go through labour. read between the lines.
August 5th, 2008 at 2:38 pm
How is she insulting people with infertility problems? Once again infertile people are projecting their pain onto other people. Missy is not the cause of another woman or another man’s infertility issues. That is their problem and their issue to deal with and the person without seemingly fertility issues does not need to get all politically correct and sensitive. It’s silly. Simple as that. She didn’t say infertile people suck, or as I heard one “fertile” person actually say, lucky. Yikes! She said she doesn’t want the pain of labor and would prefer to adopt. Rip out her female parts and burn her at the stake! How dare she not want to give birth because it hurts! She should love pain!
Not ever mother needs, can, or wants to go through the pregnancy and birthing process to fulfill the role of being a loving and nuturing parent. It doesn’t bother me that a “fertile” person prefers to skip that process and receive their beautiful child through adoption.
I love Missy. I think she is a genius producer and musician who brings her own sexy-tough-rocker-rap style to hip hop. I think she will be a delightful mom for any child.
August 5th, 2008 at 3:12 pm
Perhaps Missy thought this was a less divisive comment than stating she is not interested in going through IVF etc. as I don’t believe she is straight. In any case, she would be commended for stating she is interested in adopting, period. It was the “explanation” that has people irate. She should not have to explain her reasoning to anyone, as it is a personal, private matter. Let her do her own thing, and hopefully a child will benefit from it!
August 5th, 2008 at 3:37 pm
wow. hmmmm…..I don’t think she should be attacked for what she said at all. Her circumstance has zero to do with other’s fertility problems. It’s ridiculous to say that’s insulting. If someone said, “I’m mad at her! I’m jealous! I wish that I could choose” then that would be a different story. But to say that’s a slap to others is a stretch. It’s not up to you to judge how people want to bring a child into their life. you have no idea her situation. Famous people dodge giving real answers all the time….that’s how they keep privacy. And there’s a big elephant in the room that no one’s mentioning that might have A LOT to do with why she’s also interested in adoption.
August 5th, 2008 at 3:58 pm
Jane R.
Lets just agree to disagree and say we know ppl in different predicaments… is that fair… my bosses mother in law has adopted 4 children. two of them were adopted at 7 and 9 and the other two are special needs… she has TOLD ME WITH HER OWN MOUTH that not more than 24 hours after she tells her social worker she’s ready for a new one, there’s a new one in her home… she said that out of the 4 she had adopted, there have been 6 others that’s she’s tried to adopt for whatever reason…
a very close friend of mine mother has adopted three sisters and will soon be adopting their brother (as soon as he’s born) because their crack addicted mother will NOT stop getting pregnant. she fostered the first for abt a year, and the county is damn near paying her to adopt those children… the chldren are healthy and happy, and the entire time she’s been pregnant this last time, she’s been in jail, so at least this last one won’t be born w/ any illegal drugs in his system… HOWEVER all of the girls are smart as a whip and not showing any effects of their drug exposure, because they were placed in a home w/ parents who love them and take care of them and dont put them in any type of box… i’m going off on a tangent… sorry…
SO while your friends’ experiences may have been different than my own friends’ experience, i’m going to wave the white flag and just say there are different ppl having different experiences…. and it has been MY experience that ppl who want the white, healthy, blonde haired blue eyed baby are gonna wait… and their gonna wait a LONG time… ppl who’ll take a baby or child who’s backgrounds are not so pristine, or are already wards of the state, are getting babies… too many damn babies… not enough foster/adopters…
August 5th, 2008 at 5:20 pm
I don’t think people are reading Missy’s comments in the context of who she is. Certainly she is not going to discuss every aspect of her life publicly, she made a glib comment that many women can relate to, as most American women are terrified of labor and birth. In her case, I believe there are other reasons why she cannot envision becoming pregnant by traditional means, and why having her body function in that way might feel unnatural to her. That, however, doesn’t mean she doesn’t have the desire, love and ability to care for and raise a child. It is absolutely ridiculous to suggest that just because one *can* get pregnant and give birth (and we don’t know that she *can*), that they shouldn’t adopt.
August 5th, 2008 at 8:18 pm
I applaud Gianna’s comments.
Missy can have whatever reasons she wants for not getting pregnant, it’s her body, her choice.
There are many children out there, especially African American children languishing in the system. As long as she will be a loving and dedicated parent, then everything else doesn’t matter.